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Mojo's Boxing Day

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iam_mojo

Mojo's Boxing Day

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Oh HAI my peeps! I has been offline for long time becas I has been so busy. Teh new regeem I has been on to keep me hale and harty has taken up much of my time. I was goen to teh vetimenariam weekly for my spa treetments, wech was goin very well until my stupid staff decided to onse again take a THIS TIME UNAUTHORIZED trip to QBA, a small Caribbean nation of which I am teh Commandante en Jefe, as you all know. I did not appprove or sanction teh trip sins as far as I can tell my delegate, RAUL, is doen good job of runnen plase in my absense as I can see by keepen abrest of diplomatik cables from my extensive network of CATS in QBA.

NEWai, they insisted it was v. important for them to go to Qba on trip which coensided suspishously with comen of Catnadian cold season and I went to stay at CAT SPA weth cat lady. But on Monday I got to feelen pretty bad and THROWED UP sevral times wech I usually only does onse. And cat lady called "vet on call" Monday nite and took me to see Dr. Debbie next day. And they did more tests on my magnificent self (Dr. Debbie said "Why don't we wait until his stoopid hooman staff come back to do teh tests- " and Cat Lady said "Oh just do teh damned tests!" That is why my staff leave me at teh CAT SPA while they is away, Cat Lady is all about teh cats and damn teh hoomans.)

So everybody desided I needed to have teh SPA TREATMENTS (wech involves me gettin FLOOUD under my skin) more than onse a week, and that is when my incompetent staff came back from Qba and desided that - u r not goin to bleeve this - desided that THEY would learn to do my SPA TREATMENTS at home as they figgered it was less stressful for me to do it 3-4 times a week at home, not goin to Dr. Debbie's.

"EXCUSE ME," I sed when they tried it teh first time. "Is this Amateur Hour? Where are teh vet techs? Why isn't any1 wearin scrubs? Why are ur hands shaken?" Mostly I sed "DO NOT WANT" and tried to make that clear teh first, second, therd time. "I WANT TO SEE SOME EVIDENSE OF TRAINEN IN VETIMENARIAN ARTS!`` All of whech protests was ignored. However, they got better at it and not quite as stoopid and weth teh weather changen, it occurred to me that it was kind of nicer to do it in 7 minuts at home, and was kinda more comfy than haven to get in my carrier, go to Dr. Debbie`s offise, and come back home in teh cold, 3-4 times a week. So we has reached a kind of de tent, where I allows them to do it without too much fuss (it doesn`t feel v. uncomfortable, but I sure acts like it does for reasons of manipulashion) and they does it without too much psychological trawma to them.

Also, it was Chrissmass! I got a ball and a spring and a mouse (not a real one I SUPPOSE THAT WOULD BE TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR JUST ONE YEAR). So we all had v. merry Chrissmas and momanddad are home all this week to hang out with. So MERRY CHRISSMAS and HAPPY HOLLYDAYS to all my peeps and ur families. I`m goin to curl up in my little cat bed next to teh heating grate behind teh bathroom door and dream about tomorrow, wech will if experience holds be even better than today.

yrs healthily,

mojo
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